The writing prompt for this week is – Lists of things you don’t want either to give or get. I brought in an old friend of mine for that.
The List
I ran into my friend Ronald the other day. He was looking rather forlorn. This was unusual for Ronald. He always seemed to be a perky person, looking for adventure, ready to tackle any trouble coming his way. At least, as long as the trouble passed him by and was foisted on someone else…usually me.
So I asked him, “You look troubled, Ron, what’s up?”
“I don’t understand it,” he said, “everywhere I go and try to do something, I get sent away.”
“Can you give me some examples?” I asked.
“You know that kid that’s been missing in our neighborhood for a week? Well, I thought I saw him, so I went to the police station and wanted to report it, but they wouldn’t let me in.”
“Isn’t that the same kid that you’ve been going to the police every day since you heard there was a reward for information to finding him, telling them that you’ve seen the kid somewhere else?”
“Yeah. What’s your point?”
“And haven’t you been at home the last 3 days claiming to be sick?”
“I had to go get my medicine,” he replied, “and the drug store is next to the police station, and I could have seen him there.”
“Where else have you been sent away from?”
“The Supermarket. Is it my fault that the few times I’ve been in Stop and Shop, something stacked collapsed in the aisle I was in? And I was going to pay for that bag of cookies, but I forgot to take them out of my cart, or maybe it was my jacket pocket because my cart was full; I’m not sure. Now, if anyone recognizes me in the store, they ask me to leave unless a responsible adult accompanies me.”
“Is that all?” I continued.
“Well, there is your parent’s house. That’s been going on since we were kids. It’s just not fair.”
“Look at it this way,” I suggested, “Most criminals gain their notoriety by being placed on a public ‘Wanted’ list, gaining more fame the higher they rank. Conversely, you have gained your notoriety and rank as ‘Number 1’ on everyone’s ‘Unwanted List’ with very little work on your part.”
Ronald thought about that for a few seconds and smiled, “You know, you’re right. I am famous for not getting myself in trouble, yet no one wants me around. It’s an honor to be on an unwanted list.”
“Except you’re not on my unwanted list.” I said, “I still consider you my friend.”
“True,” he said, “which reminds me, I have a great idea of what we can do today.”
I stammered, “You…i..idea…us together?”
“Sure!” he shouted. It’ll be great fun. What could possibly go wrong?”
