The writing prompt I took was a quote by Anne Lamott, “The very first thing I tell my new students on the first day of a workshop is that good writing is about telling the truth.”
The Last Stand
“You need to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.” the judge said.
“Excuse me,” was my reply. “Who’s truth am I supposed to tell? I mean, there’s the truth, the way I see it. There’s the truth the way the witnesses see it. There’s the truth the way the law sees it. There is the truth the way the Almighty sees it. There’s the truth, the way the victim sees it. There are truths the way the lawyers see them. And there are truths, the way politicians see them. So, which truth do you want to be heard?
The judge was about to answer when a politician in the back of the court called out. “I object! Clearly, there are biases in those questions.”
The judge banged her gavel, declared the politician out of order, and made him sit down.
Again, the judge was going to answer my question when another politician stood up and said, “I object! We have a right to hear all truths as each individual perceives them.”
The judge banged her gavel again. “You’re out of order. One more outburst from any politician, and you will be charged with contempt!”
For the third time, the judge appeared to be about to answer my question when the defense lawyer stood up and said, “May it please the Court.”
The judge took a deep breath and acquiesced. “Go ahead,” she said.
“Isn’t there only one truth, regardless of who answers the question?”
“I object,” called out the prosecuting attorney. “The defense is trying to lead the witness.”
The judge looked at them all and said, in a rather loud and annoying tone, “EVERYONE SIT DOWN! This is not a debate on who is telling the truth and who is not. The facts should clarify what we should believe. This is a court of law. If I hear any more discussion on what is truth, I will clear the court and hold you all in contempt. Do I make myself clear?”
There was stunned silence in the courtroom.
After a thoughtful pause, the judge continued, “Now, considering the nature of this crime and the number of outbursts and control issues of the people in this courtroom, I suspend all trial procedures and declare the defendant guilty.”
“But…” was called about by pretty much everyone in the room, along with a cacophony of screaming names and threats.
This time, the gavel was not rapped. Instead, the judge pulled an air horn from under her bench and played it very loudly… quieting the room.
The judge then calmly said, ‘I’ve had enough of this. Day in and day out, I must listen to all this bickering and tripe. So, by declaring that the trial is finished, you can all appeal the decision to another court and judge. You always do that anyway. Let it be their problem. Court dismissed!”
The judge got up and left.
