Summer Saturday
Summer Saturday, my day off; the day I get to relax and do whatever I want to with no issues to deal with; a time to have fun.
Did you ever wake up in the morning and realize that you forgot to do something the night before?
I woke up ready to embrace the day when I realized I had no clothes to wear. I remembered putting my clothes in the clothes washer the previous night but couldn’t recall if I ever put them in the dryer. I went downstairs, put my damp clothes in the dryer, turned it on and decided to have a leisurely morning breakfast at home in my PJs. Luckily the paper is delivered to my front door so I didn’t have to go out in my nightwear.
Did you ever get a different newspaper delivered to you than the one you subscribe to?
Picking up the paper I noticed that it was the National Enquirer, not Newsday. Well, at least my morning reading would be more interesting than the usual tripe. Time for some real news.
I took out a couple of eggs from the Fresh Farm Eggs carton in the fridge and put them in a pot of water to hard-boil them. Raw eggs are not supposed to float, are they? After testing out the rest of the eggs in the carton, I chose to have cereal instead. By the time I was done with breakfast and the paper, my clothes were dry.
Did you ever take clothes out of the clothes dryer and realize they were too hot to wear immediately, so you put them in the freezer for 10 minutes?
Getting dressed was a new experience. My pants and socks were warm, yet my shirt and underwear were quite cold.
I decided that it would be a good time to drive to the city and see the new exhibit at the Museum of Natural History. It took me a while to find parking, but I was lucky and found street parking, so I wouldn’t have to pay for a garage. I was looking forward to seeing the new dinosaur exhibit.
Did you ever get stopped from entering a museum because you were holding a pocket knife in your pocket?
I wasn’t allowed in until I got rid of the knife and they wouldn’t hold it for me. It would have been a long walk back to the car, so I decided to bury it across the street by a tree in the park, where I could recover it later.
After getting into the museum I immediately went to the new exhibit. It was amazing. The dinosaur was a Bambiraptor. It kind of looked like a bird, but it was a dinosaur. I was intrigued at how realistic they made it look. I decided it would be cool to take a selfie next to the Bambiraptor that I could share with all of my friends. Not the best idea on my part.
Did you ever have your camera confiscated and then be thrown out of a museum for ignoring the NO PHOTOS ALLOWED and DO NOT TOUCH THE EXHIBIT signs?
Once the guard personally escorted me from the museum I was given my camera back after he watched me delete the photos that I had taken. There was nothing much left to do but to retrieve my knife and head back home.
Did you ever notice that one tree in the park looks just like many others?
I searched for a good 30 minutes trying to find where I had buried my knife when a very polite policeman, who had been watching me dig holes throughout the park, asked me to follow him out of the park after making sure that I wasn’t an international terrorist. All I could do was to give up my search and return to my car empty-handed. I was pretty sure I was at the spot where I had parked my car, but it wasn’t there.
Did you ever notice that if you leave your keys in your car when you park it in the city, there is a good chance someone else will avail themselves of them?
After more time with the police, I was left with either calling a friend to pick me up or riding mass transit back home. The police at the station allowed me to make a call to my friend to pick me up as I did not have enough money for the train. Lucky for me, my neighbor had a spare key to my house so I could get back into it.
The rest of the day was quietly spent sitting by the phone waiting for the call that would tell me my car had been found, which never came.
I decided to go down to the local pub and get myself something to eat and drink to celebrate the fun summer day I had had.
The waitress looked familiar to me. She might have been a woman I dated in the past and dumped me because I cheated on her. I’m not sure. I smiled at her as I ordered a bacon cheeseburger with a side of onion rings and a salad. She handed me the drinks menu and asked me, “What’s your poison?”
Did you ever notice that sometimes when someone uses an idiom or catchphrase, they literally mean what they are saying?
